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Proper Cigar Etiquette

22 Friday Mar 2013

Tags

cigars, cutting, enjoy, George Burns, humidor, lighting, Mark Twain, men, prep, regulars, Rudyard kipling, smoke, sticks, Tops Shelf Cigars, Winston Churchill

Smoking a good cigar can be one of life’s great joys. It can also be a little intimidating for a beginner. When I started out I had to endure several long months of trial and painful error. I hope you can avoid that.

**NOTES: This article is a little long. Therefore, I’ve divided it into sections with bold caption headings. If you have a question about a particular subject, just scroll down until you see it. Of course, I think the story is worth reading in its entirety.

Also, this is a guide to proper cigar smoking, not a guide to cigars (I do briefly touch on some common elements though). My aim here is to educate readers about the how-to’s of the cigar world. I leave picking a stick to you, your imagination, and your local tobacconist.**

And now, here’s some cigar advice:

Finding a Cigar Shop

First, you need to find a good cigar shop. For an idea of what a great shop is, re-read my column in praise of my local tobacconist: Top Shelf Cigars, https://perrinlovett.wordpress.com/2013/03/03/top-shelf-cigars/. Try to emulate that, if you can.

(Where the smoke “just pours out!”)

Gas stations, drugstores, and super-markets sell cigars (some of them have a decent selection too). However, to get the most out of the experience one must venture into an establishment dedicated to the sale of tobacco – fine tobacco, not a cigarette outlet. There are also cigar outlets – avoid them if possible. You want a decent place with several hundred “facings” (types of cigars to choose from) and a comfortable lounge for smoking in (preferably complete with several happy regular customers).

In addition to places that sell food, medicine, and Marlboros, here are some other things to avoid. If you enter a shop, ask for help, and they tell you a membership or fee is required to smoke therein – leave. If the place is full of stoned-looking reprobates – leave. They are stoned and not from good tobacco. If a U.S. retailer hawks “Cuban” cigars at their shop – don’t even bother. They’re either lying or breaking the law. If you walk in and see a bunch of odd-shaped glass pipes – leave, it’s a head shop. I hate to list this one for fear of..oh heck… if the shop is populated by children, women, and/or teenagers, then it’s not going to be a good time. By and large, cigars are for men. There, I said it.

Picking the Perfect Cigar (For You)

Once you find a good shop, you need to pick out a good cigar. Any place worth its smoke will have a knowledgeable staff who can assist you with your purchase. Beginners traditionally stick with lighter, milder sticks to start with. Something strong enough for a veteran may send a newbie to the bathroom for a prayer at the porcelain altar. Beware. Also, it helps to eat something first. Go try the new hobby on a Saturday after lunch or dinner. Be prepared to devote at least an hour to the smoking alone. Picking the right stick can take a while in addition – set aside two hours to do it right. Smoking with a friend helps too though you’re likely to make friends out of the regulars. I’ve never had any trouble striking up or joining a conversation at any shop I’ve visited. Cigar enthusiasts are nice people.

(A well-stocked humidor.)

By the way, good cigars are no necessarily cheap, though not outrageously priced. Be prepared to spend at least $5-10 for a decent stick these days; boxes of 20-25 run over $100 – don’t buy boxes until you really know what you want. Good shops keep their cigars in a walk-in (or large cabinet) humidor. This is to control the temperature and humidity of the sticks. The general rule is 70/70 or seventy degrees farenheit and seventy percent relative humidity. Slight variations are acceptable. You will get used to the feel of a humidor. I can walk in and tell if everything is kosher. For the novice, look around and you will find a set of gauges somewhere. Make sure their readings are close to 70/70. If the sticks are too cold or dry they will crack and ruin the experience. If they get to warm or wet bad things can happen – remember the movie Gremlins? If their humidor is off and the staff doesn’t pre-emptively apologize and explain it’s a freak problem, you should probably move on. Also, if you inspect a stick and see little things moving on it that look like bugs, they are. Cigar beatles to be exact. Time to leave.

Speaking of appearances, you will notice immediately a wide variety of shapes, sizes, colors, and titles. The color, texture, and dry versus oily appearance have to do with the type of tobacco and the way it is presented or manufactured. Most of these babies are hand-crafted by skilled personnel in the Dominican Republic, Nicaragua, Honduras, or elsewhere. Some cigars are square due to being “box pressed” or formed inside a squared off mold. I don’t like those as a rule, you might love them.

Cigars are generally three parts: the “filler” is the core tobacco inside; the “binder” encases the filler; the “wrapper” is the pretty piece of tobacco on the outside. Look for a wrapper without too many visible veins (it’s a leaf after all), cracks, or other imperfections. Look for smoothness and consistency.

The shade of the tobacco is usually somewhat indicative of its “strength” or the intensity of the taste. Darker generally means full-bodied and stronger, though not always. I recommend a lighter (natural or Connecticut) wrapper cigar for starters in a medium size. Cigars are measured length by ring gauge (width). Ring gauge is a function of 64ths of an inch. Thus, a 6×60 cigar is six inches long with a diameter a little less than an inch. That’s a big cigar (I’m finishing off a GIANT 7×70 right now), go for something a bit smaller. I’ll leave size descriptions and names to the local tobacconist along with explanations of the tobacco in the stick and where it’s from.

When judging a cigar in the humidor, very gently squeeze it between your thumb and forefinger. If it’s rock hard you will have a hard time puffing and keeping it lit. Too soft and it may burn too fast. Uneven feel may mean an uneven burn and necessitate regular touch-ups with fire. Sometimes these issues can’t be avoided, even the best sticks may have a bad lot. If you have horrible problems (splitting, grossly uneven burn, or an inability to draw smoke from fire to mouth, see the owner/staff. A good shop will replace a problem stick. If they give you a hard time, it may be time to leave.

A final word about stick picking: find what you like. This will mean some experimentation. Start with general recommendations but gauge all cigars by how happy they make you. There are several major publications which rate and review cigars. These can be good sources of information. Just remember, they usually require advertising or fees for their reviews. And, they come up with some of the most convoluted taste formulas imaginable. I really never pick up on notes of pencil lead, moss, cinnamon, or garlic or whatever. I smoke for the taste of tobacco; I like what I like. Follow that rule.

A final, final word about taste: some cigars are flavored – naturally and artificially. Seasoned pros tend to shy away from these. You should too in the beginning. If you discover you love them, stick with them, and be prepared for some teasing…

Prepping the Cigar

Okay, you’ve found a comfy, friendly location and the perfect starter stick. You’re almost ready to start enjoying, but not just yet. First, you must perform a little preparation. Almost all individual cigars come wrapped in cellophane. Some come in glass or metal tubes, some come in paper boxes and some in fancy little wooden boxes. Obviously, a cigar must be extricated from its tube or box prior to lighting. So to, must a stick be freed from its cellophane. I’ve seen too many people cut the cigar while it’s still wrapped. Don’t do that, it’s just tacky. The plastic comes off easily, usually in one fluid movement although some are closed off by a little paper sticker. Just tear the sticker and open her up.

Unlike a fine wine, a fine cigar does not need to breathe before being enjoyed. It does require proper cutting and lighting though. Professionals have their own ways of accomplishing these important prerequisites as unique as they are. Many of the old hands who actually make the sticks are known to simply bite the cap (the rounded end of the wrapper) off and light with a regular old Bic lighter. That works fine and I’ve none it myself but I’m here about etiquette today, I’ll act like it.

Cigar cutters are specialized tools designed to leave a clean-cut. Punches are just that, they punch little holes in the cap for smoke to exit through. They don’t work well on tapered or pyramid type cigars. I don’t use them – personal habits. V-cutters make a …. yep, “v” shaped grove in the cap. I don’t really care for those either. I like a full opening at the end for full smoke and taste delivery. I use a guillotine cutter. This device has two semi-circular bladed that converge together to shear off the end of the cap. Some have only one blade, two generally work better. Some are scissor-like, others are pressed together in a straight line without a hinged angle, others are actually little versions of that dreaded device from the French Revolution – for cigars, not nobility. Watch your fingers, please. On a regular, rounded cap, just cut off about 1/8th of an inch; for tapered designs, try half an inch or so.

Cigars can be lit by just about any source of sufficient heat. Matches, Bics, Zippos, butane torches, camp fires, and stove elements all do the job. Most reputable shops will have a selection of modern lighters in their lounge area. Some purists shun gas-powered lighters period, claiming they impart a petroleum taste. I don’t recall ever being bothered by this, you likely won’t either; I had to mention it though. The prim and proper way to light is to use any source to first ignite a slender strip of cedar (on hand in good shops), the cedar then lights the cigar – and makes an ashy mess. They really classic way to light was taught yours truly by an old Cuban doctor for whom I had the gravest respect, it is as follows: lightly toast the foot of the cigar (open end, opposite the cap) BEFORE clipping the cap. Just char it slightly. Then cut the cap. Then light with cedar. This supposedly preps the cigar for optimum smoke-ability and flavor.

Lighting the Cigar

However you get there and whatever you use, eventually the fire will meet the leaf. “Toasting” is always a good first step to heat up the 70 degree end. Keep it light, watch carefully so that you don’t start a fire up part of the wrapper and binder. Concentrate all firepower on the foot! Speaking of, lighters these days can come with two, three, even four or five flame jets. These will light a stick instantaneously or cut steel. Beginners would do well to stick with one jet or flame for precision.

Once your cigar is adequately toasted – judged by eye, then it’s time to fire it up! Put the cool end in your mouth (don’t bite down – loose and gentle) and take a few slow, long draws while firing the other end at the same time. Rotate the cigar with your fingers while lighting in order to assure an even light. It’s quite normal for open flames to come from the end, they die out almost at once. After several turns and good puffs, take a look at the burning end. It should be red evenly across the entire foot. Touch up as needed. Be mindful to only return the cool cap end to your mouth. I’ve done it the other way and it’s not pleasant!

Smoking

Now that the little beauty is lit, you can sit back and enjoy. Take it slow and easy. I am frequently accused of huffing and puffing my sticks like the Big Bad Wolf. A quality cigar will continue to smolder for about five minutes after you draw on it. If it goes out, you are going too slow. Re-lighting can tarnish the taste with a bitter or stale flavor for a second. It’s not horrible but should be avoided. Take regular draws.

Larger sticks may require a double puff to fully extract the right amount of smoke. That smoke should be contained in the mouth. Let it circle around as you would a good wine or whiskey. As it passes over the different areas of your tongue you will taste the various elements of the tobacco. This is a genuinely delightful process. Enjoy it as you would a good massage or a great steak or other delight. The tastes may change as the cigar burns or they make remain even throughout. Blow out once the taste subsides. You can keep the stick in mouth or hold it and look at it in wonder.

(Don’t he look happy?)

Cigars are not cigarettes. Do not attempt to inhale the smoke as it is a little stronger than what you’re used to and can sear the lungs most unpleasantly. Cigars are meant to be enjoyed for their flavor. Absorb it. You will also absorb nicotine; if you find yourself dizzy, back off a little. A little buzz is fun, getting sick is not. Also, a little ash is great to look at, a large ash is looking for somewhere to fall. Dump the old ash at intervals to keep it from falling on your lap; try it every inch or so.

Ashes to Ashes

When, sadly, the cigar is done, one must part with it. Some will smoke right down to a nub, until their fingers are singed. I recommend stopping when there’s about an inch to an inch and one-half left, about where the “band” is or was. The band is the cigar’s label, usually very intricate and decorative. You may leave a band on while smoking, remove it before lighting, or take it off once the stick is going. Bands that sit too high need to be either removed or pushed down a bit. You want your lips on the leaf only. If you move or peel off the band, do so with care. The band is a paper ring, closed on itself with a little dab of glue.

Sometimes the band is really tight, sometimes a little glue gets on the leaf and secures the label in place. The glue is a natural non-toxic plant material and won’t hurt you or the cigar. However, if ripped off forcefully, it can take part of the wrapper with it. Finesse is the key here. If it doesn’t budge with ease, leave it in place. As the fire approaches it will loosen up and then is easy to remove. Do not smoke the band! Not unless you like the added taste of burned paper!

When the cigar is done, just lay it in an ashtray. Don’t try to crush it out as this can cause flare-ups and an abundance of smoke which soon grows stale and stagnant. An active cigar produces wonderful smelling smoke. You may find yourself enjoying it second-hand. Stale smoke is, well, stale.

Meet the Regulars!

While you smoke, feel free to interact with those around you. Cigar shops are always the home of interesting men of many different walks of life. Join a conversation! If you’re new, they will likely want to know all about you. Have fun and make friends!

(Join the fun!)

The shop is an ideal place to get away and enjoy your free time. Not free? Bring a little work with you. In addition to smoking and talking, men find the lounge a great place to check emails, read, or write. I’ve crafted some of my best blog columns at Top Shelf Cigars. I’ve even met clients there. Keep the phone conversations to a minimum. If you must field a call it’s best to do it outside the lounge. While friendly, regulars are not nosey and don’t care to hear you talk to the wife or the boss. It’s a shame I have to mention this, but mind your manners in shop. Rude or obnoxious behavior will not only make you a pariah, it can get you ejected as well. Remember, it’s a happy place for respectful adults. No-one likes a jerk or a know-it-all. I’ve seen idiots bounced out. Don’t be “that guy.” Once you’re “initiated” into the regulars you will find out the personality of the place – usually collegiate with lots of good-natured humor. Thin skin usually isn’t well suited for lounging!

Cigars at Home

You can, of course, enjoy your smoke in the comfort of your home. Usually, with a wife and kids, that means out back, on the porch, or in the garage. I’m in the garage right now. Take the opportunity to create your own little cigar lounge! A chair, an ashtray, a cutter and lighter is all you need. Add a little fire pit or a radio and you’re in cigar heaven.

Smoke on the Road

The car can be a great place to smoke, particularly on longer trips. Keep a window cracked or down to avoid a buildup of stale smoke and to maintain road visibility. You may need to freshen the interior up from time to time as well. Be mindful that when you smoke the smoke gets in your clothes and can stay there. The people in your upcoming meeting may not appreciate it. The taste of smoke will also linger in your mouth and on your breath. You will get used to it but brushing or a little gum or mints will go a long way towards societal interaction post smoke. Bear in mind that in the tight confines of an auto, falling ashes will make a greater mess, and one harder to clean up. Falling embers (happens with the best sticks) can mean a hole burned in your pants or shirt. Take precautions as needed.

Public Relations

Cigars can be fun just about anywhere. They make yard work less tedious. They go naturally with a fishing trip. They can help one relax at the beach or in the mountains. I love strolling along behind my family on vacations, puffing away carefree. If I do have a care, it’s not to offend the non-cigar public. Oddly, not everyone likes cigar smoke. Be mindful of others and try as best you can to shield them from what they might find offensive. Don’t go out of your way but exercise a little curtsey. All cigar lovers benefit from good public relations.

(Cigar in the park on a cool fall day. Ahhhh.)

Cigars on the Rocks (Drinks and Smokes)

In the comfort of your home man cave or the comfort of your home away from home, you may decide to pair a cigar with a suitable adult beverage. You want something that accentuates the taste of the stick, without drowning it out. Different cigars go well with different drinks – from Sprite to red wine. Usually I partake of either a dark ale or a short bit of single-malt Scotch whiskey. There’s no set formula. Again, you have to find what works best for you. As I’m typing here in the garage, I’m still smoking that beast of a 7×70. It’s a slightly stronger than average stick so I have paired it with The Duck-Rabbit’s Wee Heavy Scotch Style Ale – dark and strong (8% abv). Don’t let the drink overwhelm the smoke. A sip here and there between puffs adds a lot of enjoyment. Slamming glass after glass of 80-proof bourbon just gets you drunk – unless that’s your plan! I judge not, just offering my advice here.

Smoke Time!

Finally, I’d like to touch on when to smoke. The best answer is: whenever you feel like it and have the time. A Saturday morning cigar with coffee and the paper makes for a great time. After a long hard week, a friday night smoke is most relaxing. I know men who literally smoke from sunrise til sunset. Do what works best for you.

Conclusion

In doing your best with cigars you will join some of the greatest men in history. Mark Twain, Winston Churchill, and George Burns were avid cigar enthusiasts. Join them and your contemporaries in a great past time. Remember always your Kipling: “A good cigar is a smoke.”

(Don’t mess with Winston. Google.)

Gaining Ground, Moving Forward

20 Wednesday Mar 2013

Posted by perrinlovett in News and Notes, Other Columns

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Amazon, ASU, blog, books, Createspace, education, free courses, Kindle, MIT, Natural Law, news, Perrin Lovett, Second Amendment

This blog has nearly taken on a life of its own; it has become a ride on which I am not only the driver (author) but I am also a passenger. In my role as passenger I am delighted every day to see the new places I am taken. Of course, as the driver, I have a huge degree of input as to where I go. It’s kind of a circle … kind of … I guess. I hope you are enjoying the ride too.

Yesterday, I supposed I would expand on my writings concerning the Second Amendment and related topics. The idea was born during the wonderful Forum on the Second Amendment I participated in at Augusta State University (GRU) and some of the confusion and misinformation I perceived among the audience and my fellow, learned presenters. I already have a book in draft mode on the subject. In fact, I’ve been working on it for about 12 years now – I haven’t gotten very far in organizing a huge mass of notes and my thoughts.

The old blog, I have found, not only allows me to quickly publish articles which, by all indications, are appreciated by a wide range of people; it also gives me a chance to go through certain subjects piece by piece in a somewhat logical order. I find this beyond refreshing, academically speaking. Each post is a potential chapter-starter for later, more in-depth publications. I started this forum with two ideas in mind: 1) entertain people with my mad ravings; 2) use it as a forum to sell the books I have in various stages of publication readiness. The first part comes naturally to me. I had no earthly idea how to go about the second. Now, after several months of plodding through, the concept is just presenting itself to me.

If you have ideas (who doesn’t) and want to communicate those ideas with the world beyond simple posts on Facebook or Tweets, then I highly recommend you start a blog. Use WordPress like I do or any other forum. They are numerous, FREE, and easy to use – I’m a Luddite and I get this stuff. I would love to add you to my “blogs I follow” tab over on the left. Write about anything or everything. There are no standards here (except those we create ourselves) and possibilities are limitless.

They really are limitless. In addition to my initial goals, I have added permanent pages which feature and promote my professional business services, my academic aspirations, businesses I respect, and many other things. While I’ve received some businesses from the site, I have yet to receive a donation. Shame on you Scrooges… Just kidding. Heck, I don’t even list a way to give even if you wanted to. May have to fix that…

Okay, enough babbling. I have outlined eight areas I will cover concerning the Second Amendment and related topics, though the number is subject to change. That’s one of the great things about blogging – you can change anything at any time without restriction. The first in the series will focus on the Natural Law origins of self-defense in general, the precursor to the Second Amendment’s right to keep and bear arms. The theory existed long before man devised physical weapons, when his only defense came from his actually two arms, right and left. It’s eternal. That is the main point of my first column which will debut soon.

(Google.)

Site News:

Today I am pleased to announce the arrival of the site’s fourth sponsor: Createspace! See their ad on the left (with all other ads and information). The services they offer are geared towards publishing in the modern world. I am using them for my books (soon, soon). Check out all of their unique features, which go beyond books. This is a gateway to listings on Amazon, Kindle, and other sales avenues – without having to appease a big publishing company or deal with an agent. Look into it!

I updated my CV (big resume), see above, today with some more current information – much of it the result of this site.

This evening I get a new column out. I have several near completion on a variety of topics. It all depends on work and family considerations and how I feel… Stay tuned.

In The News:

Let’s see…war, rumor of war, economic woes worldwide, double-crosses, turmoil, crises … same old stuff.

Here’s something I find fascinating and potentially very useful and educational! MIT (Massachusetts Institute of Technology for those of you in Cornfield) did something almost unthinkable a few years ago. They basically placed their entire curriculum on the internet completely free to all takers! Check it out: http://ocw.mit.edu/index.htm. They count some 2500 courses are available – again all for FREE. Here’s their promo: “Empowering Minds: Through OCW, educators improve courses and curricula, making their schools more effective; students find additional resources to help them succeed; and independent learners enrich their lives and use the content to tackle some of our world’s most difficult challenges…”

(MIT. Google.)

Essentially, one can now receive a self-guided education from one of the finest universities in the world for free. I think some courses are limited or exclude – like security sensitive nuclear classes. Otherwise, just about everything available in Boston is available to you on the same computer you’re looking at now.

I regret that I have not made full use of the program, despite knowing about it for some time. I vow to change that. In the future I intend to report on what I learn soon. They offer programs in history, economics, and political science, among many others. I need to pick something out and explore it. You should to.

A Good Cigar Is A Smoke!

15 Friday Mar 2013

Posted by perrinlovett in Other Columns

≈ 7 Comments

Tags

ale, America, burn, Cigar Aficionado, cigar shop, cigars, Cuban, draw, embargo, experience, Fidel Castro, freedom, full-bodied, George Best, government evil, Gran Habano, Groucho Marx, hand-made, humido, inflation, life, Nicaragua, Perdomo, quality, Romeo and Julieta, Rudyard kipling, scotch, smoke, taxes, tobacco, Top Shelf Cigars, Tubo, Vega and Garcia, W.C. Fields, Winston Churchill

It’s no secret that I love a good cigar, more than one if I can get them. Both of my grandfathers were avid cigar enthusiasts so maybe I inherited the gene. Dad smoked cigarettes when I was young and I never liked the smell. I never smoked cigarettes and I assumed cigars were essentially the same thing. That’s like assuming a rickshaw and the space shuttle are the same.

Within the cigar world there are many different levels. Here’s the story of my cigar learning curve:

My first cigar was a drugstore variety Vega and Garcia cheapo that my old buddy Derek brought to my bachelor party. At the time I had no idea what a good cigar was and I had nothing to compare the experience to. I puffed away gingerly; the taste was extremely strong to me. The next day, as I took my vows, I could still taste it – even after numerous beers, a pot of coffee, and brushing my teeth ten times. My wife never said anything.

The next year a friend had a baby. I went to Walgreens and dutifully bought the exact model Derek had supplied for the occasion. The experience was much the same. I wrote off cigars as offensive and impractical. I had two brother-in-laws who smoked cigars. I assumed their sticks were the same as what I had tried. One brother came for a visit and gave me a real Cuban – a Romeo and Julieta, No. 2, Tubo. He lit one up on the patio and encouraged me to do the same. I politely declined. I put the little tube, cigar and all, away. Several years later the other brother had us over to his house. I knew he would have a cigar. The mystique of the Cuban called on me and I brought it along. After a while I lit it up. I knew nothing at the time about proper cigar preservation and the stick was a bit dry. However, I realized immediately the difference between dime store cigars and premium cigars. Even dry, that Cuban was great.

I wasn’t hooked right away. I had several more non-Cuban smokes over the next year or two. Then, one summer, when we were all at the beach I decided to grab a few cigars for the guys. At that time I had only been in a real cigar shop once as a child – with my grandfather. I didn’t know where the things were sold! I ended up buying even lower grade cheapos than before. I felt like a hobo.

At the end of the same summer, the family eating at Outback. I had previously said something about wanting another cigar. My dear wife remembered and pointed out a cigar shop in the adjacent shopping center! I ventured in and explained my amateur plight to the shop keep. He took me into the walk-in humidor (I had never been in one before). There I saw thousands of cigars of all sorts. He recommend two mild sticks – an Avo No. 2, natural and a local blend of some kind. I tried both over the next week – they were excellent. The following weekend we were back at Outback. After eating I announced I was going back to the shop for another smoke. Great was my surprise to discover the place had gone out of business between my trips. I was sad.

Soon after we went to the mall. On the way back, my eagle-eyed wife said, “There’s a cigar shop!” I missed it and kept driving. Then, a few blocks away, she spotted another one. I made the turn and found my then cigar home. Two years later we relocated to Augusta and I discovered Top Shelf Cigars, the finest shop in the Southeast.

My taste in cigars has changed somewhat over the years. Newbies generally stick with lighter, milder sticks; the intensity of a full-bodied cigar can be a bit overwhelming to a beginner. After years of experimenting I have come to love the flavor of dark, full-bodied cigars. I enjoy rich earthy tones, mingled with hints of wood and leather and spice. No, I do not have the sophisticated palate of a Cigar Aficionado reviewer. But, I know what I like and I tend to stick with it. For my tastes cigars from Nicaragua offer the most harmonious smoking. Perdomo and Gran Habano are among my favorite brands.

I also tend to gravitate to larger cigars. My theory is that a large cigar delivers more flavor per puff. Perdomo and Gran Habano offer several such titans which draw (deliver smoke) easily and also burn evenly. Nothing is more frustrating to a cigar lover than a stick which burns unevenly or worse, is hard to draw smoke through. As with most things, higher quality usually means a higher price – most of the cigars I enjoy run in the $8 – $12 dollar range. There are however, numerous lower priced cigars suitable for different events. For instance, while fishing or mowing the lawn, a $3 – 4 stick is an excellent choice. All of these prices have practically doubled in the short time I have engaged in the cigar sport – mainly due to the government. Inflation is always at work but cigars and other tobacco products have been singled out for rough tax treatment of late.

(A big boy!)

Unlike cigarettes, which are usually consumed out of habit, cigars are made to be enjoyed for their own sake. The experience contributes greatly to an improved quality of life. I think with clarity while smoking and I try to treat each cigar as a unique event. I do not feel a compulsion to smoke just to have something to do. By the way, those larger cigars of mine tend to last between 2 to 3 plus hours. Time and economic considerations limit the frequency and intensity with which I smoke. Most (but not all!) people I know are subject to the same limitations.

Your tastes may be completely different from mine. Of course, variety is the spice of life. Fortunately for me (and you), the cigar world offers a wide range of tastes and sizes. Your local shop probably has several hundred varieties to choose from. Every once in a while, I like to mix up my preferences. Tastes may be affected by the season, the weather, a meal, or the complimentary drink of choice (I usually smoke while enjoying strong, dark ale and occasionally a short glass of premium single-malt scotch. The wonderful thing about cigars is that, as I said, each one (if it’s a good one) is an experience in and of itself. Once you find your particular favorite(s), you generally are assured of continuous consistency and quality. The hand-makers of these beauties take tremendous pride in their work and go to extremes to ensure continuity of quality.

The title of this column comes from a poem – a comparison between women and cigars. It certainly has overt sexist overtones. Setting aside presumed bias against women, consider it a commentary on the fickle and fallible ways of humans in general; sometimes we’re all just off, great cigars seldom are. One of the greatest lines in poetic literature: “A million surplus Maggies are willing to bear the yoke; And a woman is only a woman, but a good Cigar is a Smoke.” – Rudyard Kipling, The Betrothed, second-to-last stanza.

(Kipling in the humidor.)

There is something about the cigar life that naturally entrains itself into the consciousness, particularly in men. “I’m going to spend half of my money on cigars, booze and women. I’m going to waste the other half.” That quote is attributed to either W.C. Fields, Groucho Marx, or George Best, or I could have dreamed it up. Good quote though. It lends itself to the devotion great cigars imbue in their smokers.

I suspect a few of you frown on my subject today. That’s okay, you’re entitled to your dumb opinions. Some (usually women) find the smell of cigars offensive. Some argue that, like cigarettes, cigars contribute to health problems. I do not necessarily agree. One cigar a day is insufficient to cause any type of harm and the relaxation and enjoyment benefits far outweight any potential problems. Some historically over-exuberant smokers have experienced problems. For instance, Sir. Winston Churchill smoked cigars from the time he arose til he went back to bed – for most of his life. That life was cut short at the disappointing age of 92, it’s likely the cigars may have contributed.

Before I conclude I feel compelled to touch on the peculiar matter of Cuban cigars in America. Many non-enthusiasts I meet invariably want to know if I have ever had a Cuban. I have had several, though I never violated any law in partaking! My personal experience with Habanos has been positive overall. Cubans are the thing of legend in America due to our government’s idiotic embargo against Cuba. Most Cubans I have had live up to the hype. However, to compensate the deprived American market for our loss to government stupidity, non-Cubans manufacturers have dramatically increased their quality. I would actually prefer one of my Perdomos to most Cubans! Cubans, by nature, tend to be smaller and milder than I prefer. However, for what they are, they are terrific!

The embargo began in 1962 as a way of punishing Fidel Castro for his revolution. Gee, that certainly was worked out for us. Over 50 years later, he still enjoys his smokes everyday while we are deprived. I can foresee the day when Cubans are reintroduced into the U.S. market. There will be tremendous demand when that happens and great disappointment. This will be due to supply and demand factors. The Cuban factories already have markets for all they produce (the entire rest of the world). They will not automatically ramp-up production just for us. Instead, we will receive the lowest of the lowest of their work. These are already known as “American Cubans” – they sell them to tourists getting off cruise ships (at inflated prices). My advice is to hold off until they start shipping us the good stuff. Then again, we may have to wait another 50 years for anything.

In the menawhile, drop by your local shop and find something that suits your tastes. You’ll be glad you did.

Muddling Through College

11 Monday Mar 2013

Posted by perrinlovett in Other Columns

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

academic, accounting, Athens, business, career, CEO, classics, college, corporations, deception, Donald Trump, education, failure, finance, GA, interests, law school, lay offs, lies, MSU, muddles, old people, people, philosophy, racket, real estate, scholarship, the American dream, The Time Given, Trammell Crow, truth, UGA, UVA, What Will They Learn, youth

Given the popularity of my postings on the law, generally and regarding specific topics, and given the inclination of so many people to ask me about becoming a lawyer and what it’s like, I thought I would write something about legal education in America. It won’t be pretty but it will paint a good overall picture of the modern training lawyers undergo. First, however, I thought I would write something about the undergraduate experience which precedes law school. That’s what this article concerns. It is mainly drawn from my experiences at the University of Georgia in the early – mid 1990’s.

As my personal collegiate experience is somewhat dated (ugh….), I have tried to incorporate a little news concerning more modern college education as well. So, this piece is really about my personal muddling with an updated, universal background. I hope it serves as a guide of sorts for those entering college or already there and struggling to decide what to make of the situation. For those you who have already completed your formal education, I hope this resonates with you. It’s up to us to enlighten the younger generations so that they may achieve their full potential.

College today is much the same as it was back then. Modern students have a wealth of on-line information to assist them in picking the right school and program for them. I wished we had had that. I recently stumbled across a fantastic website that goes beyond the normal rankings and summary guides. Check out this site: http://www.whatwilltheylearn.com/. It’s an initiative from numerous alumni to assess what, if anything, colleges teach these days. The results are eye-opening. Of the 1000 or so schools surveyed only 21 got an “A” based on required core curriculum. I’m proud to say my alma mater was among them. Several famous and pricy schools did not fare so well. Watch their video too.

(Google Images.)

Back to yours truly. I started college in 1993 immediately after graduating from high school. I applied to and was accepted to three colleges (I think it was three, I’m lazy). I got accepted to Mississippi State University (in my original home town) and the University of Georgia, where many of my relatives attended. I think the other school was UVA; I attended classes for a week as a high schooler and was most impressed.

MSU offered me a scholarship, I think it was a full ride. My dad had been a professor there and apparently they needed someone from Georgia. I probably should have accepted but, given my poor choices in college, I would have likely lost the scholarship anyway. In the end, I went to UGA. The Georgia HOPE scholarship was recently enacted at the time. My high school grades were excellent and so I would have qualified. Unfortunately, my parents made something like 50 cents over the family income maximum. The next year they raised the maximum but by then my grades were so dismal it didn’t matter. I must say I had a great time in Athens. The city is overrun with bars and hot girls and there is always something to do. Oddly, none of that matters looking back.

I have since analyzed why I did as poorly as I did in the early half of my college career. I used to blame the school and several professors in whose classes I did poorly. I have come to the conclusion though that any failings (pun intended) were my fault only. I had considered that perhaps I was not ready for college. Then again, I’m not sure what I would have done instead at that time. I wanted to continue my formal education, I just went about it all wrong. I was not true to myself.

I have devoted a whole chapter in The Time Given (not long now….) to being true to yourself. My understanding of the concept comes from my own self-betrayals. In high school and for the first few years I was at UGA I was under the delusion of the great “American dream.” George Carlin once said, “it’s a dream because you have to be asleep to believe it.” I know what he meant. The dream went something like this: You go to college to get a valuable degree. The degree gets you a ticket to work for a big corporation for 30 or 40 years. By working hard for your employer you get rich and enjoy a comfy retirement. You can vacation in Destin, Florida and such.

I tried to take the dream to its extreme conclusion. I just knew I had to major in business in order to get that golden job ticket. I started out as a general business major and then switched to a speciality in real estate. UGA’s real estate program is excellent and I did learn some things in my concentration classes which came in handy at Trammel Crow and in my brief real estate sales career. I also found some of my advanced economics classes fascinating – but only from an academic standpoint. The rest of the core business classes bored the ever-loving hell out of me. My grades reflected this. I recall mornings when I remembered I had to drop classes I had not attended all semester – on the last day possible. Still figures into some of my nightmares. I recall passing finance my reading the booklet for my fancy calculator the night before the final exam. I wasted a semester in a business MIS class that covered things like floppy disks and the new-fangled internet, whatever that was. That all says something – I’m not sure what…

The “hard” problem I found with an undergraduate business degree was that you studied based on scenarios only a CEO would encounter. Then you get into the job market and discover only entry-level jobs are available. It’s kind of depressing. I really lucked out with Trammell Crow and it took me months of interviewing for scores of other positions to find. Another problem is that once you’re on the job, they retrain you completely. I’d say only 10% of what I managed to learn ended up being useful on the job.

If you want to enter business, I think it’s best to get an MBA. It also helps to study something you have connections to (the family business, etc.). Otherwise, you’re wasting your time. I wasted a lot of the stuff.

The “soft” problem I had was that I didn’t really want to be a business major. I look like a businessman but I have the heart of a history professor or a latter-day dragon slayer, neither of which benefit from a class in marketing. This was made clear to me during my senior year. For whatever reason I finished most of the required classes and had an abundance of electives to take. Out of curiosity I wound up in a number of classics (ancient Greece and Rome) and philosophy classes.

Suddenly, I was immersed in subjects that spoke to me about eternal issues I could relate to everyday American life. I also got “A” after “A” and it wasn’t hard to do. I liked the programs. I identified with the programs. I dig ancient wisdom and logical discourse more than ROI statements and accounting baselines.

It occurred to me a little late in the game to change majors and stick it out. I probably should have done that. At the time though, the same stubbornness that got me into my plight held me there. I made excuses like “I’m almost done. I need to settle, get out, and get that dream job.” Ha! The job I got was great. I foresaw myself rising in the ranks and becoming a developer, another Donald Trump. I was good at it. I thought I could even open my own business and build skyscrapers. Then, they called me one day and thanked me profusely for my hard work. I smelled a raise. Then they said the division was closing and I was no longer needed. More depression followed. This is the real American dream – you lie to yourself, waste time and money, and end up getting laid off after giving 150%. Well, it was the dream. I think most people have to settle for permanent unemployment or food stamps these days.

After a year of flopping around I headed to law school. It was my attempt to right my ship. It almost worked. I know now that while I love the concept and theory of law, present and historical, these are not good reasons to go to law school. I’ll have more on this in my coming column on the legal education racket.

I should have gotten a Ph.D. in political theory or history. Then I would have been primed for a happier career in higher education, pondering the big ideas and helping young people seek questions and answers. I’m currently trying to re-route myself that way. This blog is a grand outlet for my academic pursuits. I’m delighted by the support I have received so far. I plan to press forward regardless of what kind, if any, formal institution I end up in. I don’t mean an “institution” where I weave baskets…

Counting the four years I was locked up in high school, it’s been about 24 years getting around to being honest about my ambitions. I have been extremely lucky in the alternative. I’ve had the opportunity most people don’t get in the business and legal fields to interact with academics, statesmen, titans and ticks of all stripes. I have also been able to strike a few blows for freedom over the years. Everything happens for a reason and I have accepted my long way home.

I hope you, dear readers, find and accept yours too. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to help you. I genuinely like helping people. It’s really why I’m here.

A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Election

05 Tuesday Mar 2013

Posted by perrinlovett in Other Columns

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Tags

2004, Bush 43, Congress, Constitution, Draco, elections, Facebook, free-speech, fun, GA, John McCain, law, learning, libertarian, Marietta, mistake, morons, oppression, Ralph Reed, Republican, Ron Paul, Rush, Supreme Court, torture

In 2004 I did a stupid thing. Despite my libertarian leanings I once involved myself with the local Republican party. I did this partly as a networking opportunity and partly as an attempt to side with the famous “lesser of two evils,” a political compromise if you will. As a result I wasted a lot of time at various party events, listening to irrational people ranting about hateful or pointless things. I learned a valuable lesson though and I have never placed myself in such a demeaning situation again.

Something funny (or alarming) did happen. I’ll relate to you now. I actually got a little bit of wisdom out of the whole experience. Maybe you will too. Mainly I learned the Party was useless and certain of its members and supporters were untrustworthy at best. This story relates to one of the chief events which taught me the lesson. Enjoy!

It was George Bush, the Dimmer’s, second Presidential campaign. I was invited to travel down to Marietta, Georgia to attend a luncheon seminar on the subject and what the “grassroots” folks could expect. The featured speaker was Ralph Reed of former “Christian” Coalition and political snake-oil fame. The event was held in a trendy hi-rise and the crowd was composed of typical Republican types – older white folks in suits and such.

(The Misunderstestimator. Google Images.)

Ralph went on and on about how Bush could and should win, if only us little people would do our part. I was more interested in the menu than the rhetoric for most of the meeting. Then I caught something Ralph said which made me laugh openly. I nearly choked on my scone. He was commenting on how hard it would be to win the re-election, or any new election for that matter, thanks to the Draconian and likely illegal provisions of the dreaded McCain-Feingold campaign finance law, recently enacted. He went on for a few minutes about the horrors of doing business under the new law and then opened up for questions.

You probably can guess what happened next. I couldn’t resist. I raised my hand early and when called on I asked, “Do you mean the same McCain-Feingold law authored by Republican John McCain? Ralph, reading my thoughts, nodded affirmatively but uncomfortably. I kept on, “You mean the same law passed by the Republican majority in both houses of Congress? Ralph began to sweat. At this point, several of the well-fed attendees looked up from their dessert dishes. I pressed on, “You’re talking about the law signed by President Bush, the same guy with the current troubles? Ralph was white and shaky. He had a hard time answering me. A few more of the Rush-bots began to listen.

I further inquired, “This is the law which Bush said was probably UnConstitutional, but that he’d sign anyway?” Ralphie swooned. I should have stopped but I just could not help myself. Most of the herd was still grazing thoughtlessly, but I had a large enough audience for my point. “Didn’t Bush sign the law only to say the Supreme Court would work out the details?” I asked. At this point Mr. Reed determined to leave early and stopped my questioning with a vague, “Uh, yeah…that law.” He didn’t want the suits to catch on if they could. There were no more questions.

As if by chance, or design, I happened to take the same descending elevator as Mr. Reed. I pressed a little further. I didn’t want to harass the poor guy but the fun was too good to let slip past. I asked rhetorically, “I guess it’s up to the Supreme Court, now?” Ralph began to turn green but responded, “Yeah. We’ll have to see what they say.” I ended the verbal water-boarding, “And, we can always count on them, can’t we?” I wish there was a video to corroborate my story.

The first time I was alone afterwards I laughed loudly for minutes on end. The ride home was unremarkable though. I don’t think the person I accompanied ever caught on to what I was implying. To her, whatever this new law was, it was just another part of the process – our team versus theirs. What it really meant was that the home team consisted of a bunch of F—ing Morons! I’ve never seen Ralph since and he won’t accept my Facebook friendship request. Bad memories I suppose.

The law turned out to mean nothing to the ticks and has since been largely over-ridden. The Supremes did make their ruling – a classic in my opinion. They pointed out the oppressive, free-speech limiting nature of the law, but concluded that since it pertained to the two political branches, and since those branches had approved it, the Court would too out of deference. So they did! As I said the law has been rendered moot for the most part. Politicians don’t mind stamping out the little people’s rights and opportunities, but they sure as hell won’t have any law impinging on their schemes.

(Justice Scalia did note the chilling provisions of Mc-Gold on “average” people. Google Images.)

In the end, I guess nothing was gained or lost, except any respect I had for Republicans not named Ron Paul.

Ten Things You Can Do Today

05 Tuesday Mar 2013

Posted by perrinlovett in Other Columns

≈ 2 Comments

Here follows a list of ten easy things you can do today to make your life a little better. I tried to think of things that one can do without spending any money. Most of these don’t require much time either. I offer these as a free service to you in hopes you will spread the good word. If you already do the first nine things, pay attention to number ten.

1. Don’t Worry.

Whatever it is, it will pass. Worrying won’t help anything. In fact, spending your time obsessing over possible bad outcomes is not only counter-productive, but it places you in an impossible position of managing things of your own imagining which will likely never happen. Do what you can do about the things you can change, hand off the rest.

2. Take a Walk.

(Google Images.)

Walking, even at a slow pace over a short distance, builds muscles and burns fat. That means, it makes you physically healthy. It also allows you the chance to clear your mind of most thoughts, which rejuvenates the brain. That and the added benefit of more oxygen in the blood will make your later thinking clearer.

3. Do Something for Someone Else.

Do it without being asked to first. It can be a very small thing. But, it will have big benefits for the other person and for you. Remember, it really is better to give than to receive. A small act of kindness, for anyone, builds and promotes good character and happiness.

4. Turn off the TV.

(Google Images.)

Television can be great entertainment. It can even be informative at times. Too often though, it ends up being an escape from reality – one you don’t really need. Why waste time viewing someone else’s fake life, when you can live and improve yours. This also goes for video games and computing (not blogging though).

5. Slow Down.

My dad always said, “If you are in a hurry, you’ll waste time.” His meaning was this: if you hurry about with things, inevitably you will mess up and have to spend more time correcting your mistakes. Slow it all down. In our modern, speed-of-light society, leave instantaneous processes to computers, faxes, and cellphones. Take life in stride.

6. Build Something.

Anything. Start a blog, build a bird house, bake a pie. Create something that takes a little time and ingenuity. It’s important for humans to be creative, and whatever you create will give you a grand sense of accomplishment. Go do it!

7. Find a Reason to Compliment Someone.

It could be anything about anyone. Tell a stranger they dress well (try not to seem like a stalker or weirdo). Tell your daughter she did a good job at school. Tell your boss you’re grateful for your job. People like hearing compliments and giving them builds better relationships. Think of this as the easiest way to implement No. 3, above.

8. Read a Book.

Any book will do. Maybe it’s a classic you’ve read before several times. Try it again. See if you can pick out anything new amidst the familiar. A new book will open up new challenges and thoughts. Reading knowledge is cumulative, the more you do the better you get at it. Learn something new today.

(Google Images.)

9. Add an Outside Perspective You Already Value.

Think about any thing you’re doing and ponder how your favorite historical figure or celebrity might handle it. What would Jesus or Thomas Jefferson or Frank Sinatra do? Is their way different from yours? Compare and contrast your methods of approach and see if you don’t want to change something.

10. Make Your Own List.

If you already do the things I’ve mentioned, then compile a list of your own 10 Things and pass them along to others. You’ll be glad you did.

Top Shelf Cigars

03 Sunday Mar 2013

Posted by perrinlovett in Other Columns

≈ 13 Comments

Tags

America, Augusta, business, cigars, dominos, Esteli, Florida, GA, green space chickens, humidor, libertarian, London, luxury, Masters, New Hampshire, New York, Nicaragua, Nick Perdomo, pipes, poker, Rudyard kipling, Russell Wilder, Southeast, tobacco, Top Shelf Cigar Shoppe

I like to help people. I also appreciate good people and good services. So, I have no problem whatsoever writing this column about my great friends at the Top Shelf Cigar Shoppe in Martinez (Evans [greater Augusta]), Georgia. This is part of my continuing series on good businesses.

My family and I moved to Augusta about six years ago. I needed to find a top-notch place to purchase and enjoy fine cigars. There were and still are several tobacco businesses in the area, each unique in its own way. However, when I first visited Top Shelf I knew I was “home.”

Just about every city over 100,000 in population has at least one cigar shop. Some are decent, others are good, some are great. Top Shelf falls into the rare great category. If you live in the area and enjoy fine cigars, I highly recommend a visit. Find them on the web, here: http://www.topshelfcigarshoppe.com/. If you’re visiting or just passing through, you’ll feel right at home.

Top Shelf is the brainchild and proprietary interest of Mr. Russell Wilder. After retiring early, Russell knew he wanted to develop a special place dedicated to premium cigars and pipe tobacco. He has more than accomplished his original goal, having built one of the most recognized and distinctive stores in America. This has not been am easy process. Often he reports to work before the sun rises and doesn’t leave until it is dark again. He goes the extra mile for his customers and with his suppliers and employees.

(Russell and his boss.)

Russell regularly attends national conventions and trade shows and has a personal relationship with most of the major players in the modern cigar market. Just the other day he returned from a trip to Esteli, Nicaragua and a visit to Nick Perdomo’s growing and production operation. Nick and other cigar royalty have been quests at Russell’s shop over the years.

I’ve been to cigar shop’s from Florida to New Hampshire. The really good one’s are memorable because they get things right. In addition to maintaining an inventory which works for the local market, owners must follow trends and design their stores to be as comfortable and enjoyable as possible.

Russell has had three different locations, each an improvement over the previous incarnation. His original shop was in a shopping center. As is (or was), it was an excellent place. However, when the opportunity presented itself to move to a larger space where he could upgrade most of the shop’s features, Russell didn’t hesitate. I helped move some of the stock and furniture from place to place as did most other “regulars.” A great shop will always have at least a few regular customers on hand to demonstrate the quality of the business.

Last summer Russell made a quantum leap. He bought his own freestanding building and moved his shop to its current location on Columbia Road. This provides easy access from Washington and Wheeler roads, both major arteries, as well as access to Interstates 20 and 520. There are some interior pictures of the new shop at the link above. You may notice a rounder version of your’s truly in one of those – seated at the domino table with a few other vagabonds.

The new shop is a model of cigar industry environment and decor. It features a giant, two-room walk-in humidor with dark wood and exposed brick trim. The rest of the building (even the huge bathroom) is covered floor and ceiling in rich judge’s panelling and tongue and groove Arkansas pine. The floor is a beautiful faux stone. I played a small part in the remodeling of the new space, working several nights until late with a crew of other dedicated regulars to help Russell build his dream. It was well worth it. And, it says something about a man when so many of his friends and customers will pitch in on a construction project of that magnitude for free. The greater portion of the credit for the new design goes to one Scott Kirby, who single-handed did about 80% of the interior work. Everything you see is hand, scratch built. The design rivals anything I’ve ever seen in the cigar best of any major city. Think a luxury shop in New York or London.

(Kipling in the humidor.)

Any liquor store with a license can sell cigars. Some lower-rent aficionados go so far as to buy cigars on-line. A great shop makes for a great experience. Russell and his staff – wife Sharon (the real boss), daughter Sarah, Gerald, Tom, and Matt – know the business inside and out and can make tremendous recommendations and comparisons.

Another critical facet of a successful shop is the smoking lounge. As noted above, Top Shelf’s is trimmed in luxurious wood and stone. It has three air-cleaners to keep the atmosphere breathable no matter how many cigars are being enjoyed. There is spacious seating for many friends to gather in comfort. Russell provides humidified lockers, a giant screen television with cable, a refrigerator, free coffee, and innumerable other services. The lounge is usually busy any hour of the day, any day of the week.

As part of going the extra mile Russell offers many additional perks. The shop is home to a premium club with meets at least once a month. The meetings provide an entertaining opportunity for fellowship and the enjoyment of the latest cigars. The shop also hosts a friendly poker game once a week (no cash). Russell also is deeply involved in the community. From his annual charity golf tournament to providing cigars to local businesses and clubs to keeping the smoke-loving patrons of the Masters happy, Russell is everywhere.

An arch-libertarian, Russell is happy to give his opinion on politics and economics to both his customers and friends as well as the local media. Russell also has a keen sense for the stock market and is always dropping profitable hints to those who will listen. This level of personal service is what puts Top Shelf above just about any other store in the Southeast.

Drop by for a visit if you can. If not, scour your area for a shop with the traits I’ve listed here. You’ll be glad you did. Not a cigar lover? Shame on you. There is still time!