Introducing the C.F. Floyd Feature Writer of National Affairs

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That would be yours truly. Over at The Piedmont Chronicles. Our inaugural outing:

Zuck It Up: On the Meeting of a Social Mogul and the Contemptible Congress
-or-
Br’re Fox and Br’er Bear Outwit Br’er Rabbit

The great concern of the people is that Facebook violated their privacy and misappropriated their cherished personal information: email addresses, voting habits, cat pictures, etc. Zuckerberg admitted as much, roundaboutly. Hence, the popular clamor for regulation: if not from Big Social, then by Big Brother.

Now for my funny, impromptu thought. Remember Uncle Remus? Surely your parents read to you those beloved moral stories by Joel Chandler Harris. It seems to me that what I witnessed on the Tube was, literally, a meeting between a sly, elitist, globalist corporatist and a bunch of mid-witted, elitist, globalist statists. Allegorically, I saw an Uncle Remus tale unfold.

The American people played the part of Br’er Rabbit. Facebook and Zuck represented Br’er Fox. Uncle Sam was Br’er Bear. Play along here… The happy little rabbit, while busily posting meal pictures and juvenile memes, noticed the mean old fox was cheating him. Incensed, the rabbit angrily demanded action, either from the fox or from Br’er Bear. In other words the hapless bunny tattled on the small predator to the large predator. Seems risky to me.

Read More at TPC.

TPC

TPC/MBM.

This is a new, weekly feature column and the start of what will surely become National $yndication. You can help. Call or email your local fish wrapper and request demand they carry my column$. Thank$ a million.

When Will We Learn?

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Dear Gawd, think of the children.

Seven students at a Maryland elementary school attacked themselves or each other with assault pencil sharpeners.

Seven students at an elementary school in Prince George’s County cut their wrists at school using blades from pencil sharpeners, according to officials.

Officials with Prince George’s County Public Schools said a concerned parent at William Paca Elementary School in Hyattsville came forward on March 29 and an investigation was launched.

It was revealed that the students used blades out of pencil sharpeners to cut themselves, officials stated.

All seven students were seen by the school nurse and none of the children were taken to the hospital, according to officials. School counselors were brought in to speak with the students.

Stop the madness! No civilian needs a high capacity pencil sharpener. Come to think of it, no civilian needs a pencil. Police and military. Young Hogg. Crying. Scary. I blame the… CNN, School Shooting™.

#SharpenerControl

#PencilControl

The news gets worse:

A “man,” practically a child at 38, was arrested for stalking Taylor Swift with a knife and rope:

Meanwhile, police obtained a temporary restraining order preventing Sandrock from possessing guns.

According to the document, Sandrock was wearing a mask and rubber gloves when he was taken into custody and told police he had driven from his home in Broomfield, Colorado, to see Swift.

Sandrock told officers he owned three handguns and was on probation in Colorado for firing one, police said.

A search of his car turned up a knife, rope, ammunition and more masks and gloves, according to the restraining order.

Prescription medications, including oxycodone, were also found and Sandrock told arresting officers that he had depression, bipolar disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder and manic episodes, according to the document.

The arrest followed the April 8 arrest of a homeless man on suspicion of trespassing after he tried to climb a wall at the same property and ignored warnings by security guards to leave.

Swift was not at the home.

Banned from possessing guns but NOT pencil sharpeners…

Swift, one notes, is a mere child herself – likely not much older those those tots in MD.

#KnifeControl

#RopeControl

#CONTROL!

800

Gurl, Imma let you finish … but first muh #knifecontrol… AP.

Call the Khan Man.

Three Stories

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These three kind of go together. I like finding semi-related issues or tales and mixing them together; James Altucher calls it “idea sex.” Anyway, it’s been a long day so I’ll leave the interweaving to you and those XXX minds…

All three are health matters, if you will. All three are important. Here goes:

Canadian Liberals Attempt to Decriminalize ALL Illicit Drugs

Go Liberals! Read the reasons why and then about the experience in Portugal. This was also one of Ron Paul’s ideas back when elections still sorta almost mattered. If Canada becomes the first G7 to return to the traditional minding of one’s own health business, trust the US to be last.

Labels, Public Info Everywhere, 10,000 Diets Books, and Americans are Still Getting Fatter

Drugs, guns, knives, cars, bad doctors, and just about everything else take a backseat; this is THE epidemic. It’s one with surprisingly simple solutions but also with extremely organized enemies of the public health.

American Man Graduated from College and Taught School for 17 Years and He was Illiterate

In a nation awash in money, schools, books, ebooks, and free time, a horrendous percentage of the people either can’t read, can’t read well, or won’t read. This vexes more than just the word-slinging mercenaries. “Adults who can’t read are suspended in their childhoods, emotionally, psychologically, academically, spiritually. We haven’t grown up yet.” He got help. There’s always hope.

Maybe that’s the tie-in. We, collectively speaking, can make it all better: health and fitness, crime-free sobriety OR responsible enjoyment, and reading the fun and wisdom of the ages.

Not so much wisdom here, tonight, I fear. Tired. Long (good) day.

Evening, friends.

-P

Total Knife Control Failure

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The failings of knife control are as predictable as the failings of gun control. Even in a place where everything is controlled and all weapons are strictly forbidden. A lesson from a South Carolina prison:

COLUMBIA, S.C. (AP) — Inmates armed with homemade knives fought each other for about seven hours over territory and money, leaving seven of them dead in the worst U.S. prison riot in a quarter-century, officials said Monday. An inmate who witnessed the violence told The Associated Press that bodies were “literally stacked on top of each other.”

At least 17 prisoners were seriously injured at Lee Correctional Institution, South Carolina prisons chief Bryan Stirling said. The first fight started in a dorm about 7:15 p.m. Sunday and appeared to be contained before suddenly starting in two other dorms. Cellphones helped stir up the trouble, and state officials urged the federal government to change a law and allow them to block the signals from prisoners’ phones.

Criminals gonna criminal. And if they can’t get weapons, they make them. Someone pass this along to the Khan Man.

Temporal proximity raises speculation: will SC be the target of Young Hogg’s next bullying session?

Perrin Lovett/FPTV.

The Modern Sirens of Finland

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Somebody call Martha Burke! There’s another egregious case of sex discrimination.

Okay, no one cares as this case involves excluding the evil bearers of male privilege:

We’ve all had those moments, whether you’re drowning in work in a cramped cubicle or just tired of the daily grind. In those moments, a thought might cross your mind, like “I wish I could escape to a private island.”

Well, entrepreneur Kristina Roth actually made that happen. She’s not just escaping to an island, she owns it. And she’s opening it up to women worldwide. But men? They’re not allowed.

“I’m a computer scientist, and I worked only with men. Ergo, how many times did I have to listen to ‘Hey blondie, what are you doing here?’ At least that was during my studies,” says Roth. “And I think judging a book by its cover — again that’s a cliché — that happens a lot in the tech world.”

Roth wanted to create something better. SuperShe society was born. It began as a networking group and expanded to include a lifestyle blog, events and women-only retreats in luxurious locations such as Hawaii, Necker Island and Turks & Caicos. It was meant to create a fun way for women to network — a way that men have been networking for years, Roth says, whether it’s at the golf course or the cigar club.

The golf course and the cigar club. Now what does that remind me of? Oh yeah, the harpies screamed until the National admitted women. Now the women, the kids, and who knows whom else want to ban the smokes on the course. But that’s okay. You’ve come a long way, baby.

Imagine if Blondie was a he and he started a computer company that forbade female employees. Ms. Burke?

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And that’s a-okay, really. CNBC.

Jeffery Epstein has an island for a type of men, mostly men. Excuse me, he HAD an island like that. Fire gets rid of evidence, no? Let’s assume this new venture is something different entirely. Some of you with the right plumbing might find out.

What can She do, She’s a nervous wreck?
There’s men everywhere, She better go and check (out). CHECK OUT!
She can’t tell a computer from a cigar in the ground.
They all got her golf ball spinning round and round.
Island of women, oh yeah.
The island of women, oh yeah.
It drove her insane.

Deep apologies to Billy Gibbons and the boys…

You Go, Gurl!

Read This

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Happy Tax Day Eve!

As you prepare to make those last minute payments to Mordor, please consider what the money, some of it, is spent on:

Caught in a Lie, US & Allies Bomb Syria the Night Before International Inspectors Arrive

On April 12, even US Secretary of Defense James Mattis told the House Armed Services Committee that the US government does not have any evidence that sarin or chlorine was used, that he was still looking for evidence.

Syria, finding the claims to be lies and the sources tainted, requested that the Organisation for the Prohibition of Chemical Weapons (OPCW) immediately come to Syria to investigate the claims. Accordingly, the OPCW agreed to send a team—the visas for which Syria granted immediately—which arrived in Damascus on April 14.

President Trump, instead of waiting for an investigation to confirm his ‘evidence,’ chose the very night before this investigative team would arrive in Syria to inspect the allegations, to bomb Syria. The timing of the attacks is more than just a little timely. And the bombings were illegal.

This is the same OPCW that lately took the Russian chemical out of the alleged Russian chemical poison attack in London.

Ah, heck with “facts.”

Quick recap: Assad used Tower 7 yellow cake, in a surprise attack, to sink the Maine in the Gulf of Tonkin, in violation of unarmed neutrality (NO weapons on board), necessitating income tax withholding only until the Taliban are defeated at Charleston Harbor. That’s the truth! Your taxes: pay them.

Goodbye Sgt. Hartman

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R. Lee Ermey, Marine, veteran actor and firearms spokesman, is dead.

R. Lee Ermey, a Golden Globe-nominated actor best known for his role as Gunnery Sgt. Hartman in Stanley Kubrick’s Full Metal Jacket, has died.

Ermey, whose nickname was “The Gunny,” died Sunday morning from complications of pneumonia. He was 74.

The news was announced via his official twitter account by his longtime manager, Bill Rogin, who wrote: “It is with deep sadness that I regret to inform you all that R. Lee Ermey (“The Gunny”) passed away this morning from complications of pneumonia. He will be greatly missed by all of us. Semper Fi, Gunny. Godspeed.”

I have this odd knack for meeting really cool people. I met Mr. Ermey at the Glock showcase during the 2011 NRA National Convention (which was a whole lot more fun than sitting through the usual legal panel, sorry guys…). Off screen I only knew him for two minutes. But I could tell he was the real deal, a really swell guy.

He will be greatly missed.

You know, he was always lurking around the funniest places:

Lotta Glock time. Glock/YouTube.

Da29LUSVQAA8PHw

Ermey/Twitter.

Two Announcements for a Sunday

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There’s more, much more, lurking and brewing about the Syria mess. Maybe not all bad, but all very interesting. That can wait.

Two items of critically less importance:

First: Sometime this coming week I shall fulfill my appointment as the C.F. Floyd Feature Writer of National Affairs for The Piedmont Chronicles. Charles Floyd was, of course, a titan of curmudgeonly intellectual action. Now I imagine he is still a terror to the Highlands gentry. TPC is of similar size and reach as this “highly respected web log.” What we’re pushing for with “national affairs” is syndication of national scope. Cro$$ those figures, dear readers.

Second: Laura Branigan, Gloria, 1982:

Andrew Lucas/YouTube.

Why? Because.

World’s Policeman Strikes Again

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The US, UK, and France bombed Syria overnight.

Someone said there was proof of a gas attack there. Don’t look forward to ever seeing it. There may have been an attack. The boy may have seen a real wolf. And it may have been carried out by Assad. And that might have been our problem if it hadn’t possibly, maybe, kinda, sorta happened over there. A Syrian attack against New York or Tennessee would be a different thing entirely.

As is, Damascus is some 5,900 miles away from Washington. Whatever happens there, it should not be our problem. The Trump used to think and say as much.

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The Trump/Twitter.

Seems it is now…

An optimistic note: These actions will hopefully not lead to full-blown nuclear war. More likely, they are semi-calculated pin pricks just to let the world know how tough America is. Tough looks a lot like stupid. Rumor has it that high level talks are already underway between Russia, the West, and the rest of the meddlers to avert major disaster.

Developing…and poorly…

Hating On Our Girls

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They still call this country-shaped place “America” though the shenanigans sometimes cause doubt.

Take the NFL (please!). The F is supposed to stand for “football.” Once upon a time that was a manly American sport. The post-American NFL seems to shun all things: manly, American, decent, normal, noncriminal, and free. Oh, they also shun Christian virgins too.

A former Miami Dolphins cheerleader claims that she was discriminated against by the team and the NFL for talking about her Christian faith — and mocked after she admitted that she was a virgin.

Kristan Ann Ware, who cheered on the Dolphins for three years, charged in a complaint filed with the Florida Commission on Human Relations that the workplace turned hostile after she told some of her fellow cheerleaders that she was waiting until she was married to have sex.

It got even worse, Ware charged, when she posted an image of her baptism along with a Bible verse on social media.

“Let’s talk about your virginity,” cheerleader director Dorie Grogan allegedly said when Ware arrived for an interview for returning dancers in April 2016, according to the complaint. “As far as we are concerned you have taken something that was once upon a time pure and beautiful and you’ve made it dirty.”

Ware, who is no longer with the Dolphins, is now seeking arbitration from the Florida commission and a meeting with NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell. She said female cheerleaders should be allowed to express their faith publicly the way the male players do.

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Even if she misses the job she must look much better without those gaudy anti-American, anti-Christian, anti-Western rags. Getty/CBS.

According to the Dolphins, stating the fact of one’s virginity makes it dirty? Really? Was it that, or the Baptism, or both? I’m sure that had Ware identified as a gun controlling, Hindu, Hobbit, non-binary, sodomite, she would have received some sort of award. “Three cheers for our new captain!” Any arbitrator worth his salt will order Badell, Kraft, Peter King, the freaks, and the thugs on the first boat out. And why haven’t we heard from the DOJ Office on Violence Against Women, the UN Commission on Human Rights, the NOW gang, and the #metoo brigade? Odd.

Those Americans, over forty, proud, and sane, might also find it odd that assorted lowlifes willfully attack another beautiful young woman for expressing her faith and pride in the Second Amendment.

A University of Tennessee Chattanooga senior’s graduation photo has generated controversy on social media. In the photo, Brenna Spencer is seen wearing a bright pink “Women for Trump” T-shirt with white jeans. A black handgun is tucked into her waistband.

Spencer shared the photo on Twitter Saturday and captioned the post: “I don’t take normal college graduation photos.”

I, for one, haven’t the faintest idea what’s controversial about any of this, except that I also don’t see anything about the photo as abnormal. Oh, wait. We’re in post-America now… Some non-Americans chimed in. I bet that had the shirt been a “F*ck Trump!” model they might have been more accepting. Anyway, their drivel:

@DadForChange:
Using a gun to make a political point is irresponsible gun ownership.

@Jasminleroy1:
Hmm..heres a question, what point are you trying to make by sticking a gun in your pants, I would think you want to irritate others and enhance your political point.. Are you going to use the gun( because that’s why they were made). I’m sorry but I’m confused by your ignorance.

@Eldergothfather:
If you had chosen to brandish your most valuable asset we’d be looking at your brain, we’d be seeing you accomplish something for humanity. Instead you chose a an extension which you think makes you who you are. It does not.

@keithboykin:
I don’t know anything about Brenna Spencer and don’t care if she wears a “Women for Trump” t-shirt while strapped with a gun. What bothers me is the reflexive racism that allows people to see Spencer as a “patriot” but to see an armed black woman or man as a criminal threat.

I’m not sure if the lovely Ms. Spencer or her followers wasted time replying to these wastes of oxygen. I happen to have a few seconds to spare, so:

Dad: There’s a lot of exciting change in North Korea, Sudan, Iran, etc. Why not go be happy somewhere else?

Jasmine: You’re confused and irritated but something stinks, little flower, and I think it’s you.

Goth Boy: I’m sure her pistol has done more for humanity than all the black-clad, sad-face freaks in all of history. And certainly more than yours.

Keith (kudos for using what seems like a real name): It’s not 1850 anymore. No one cares. Maybe, as he heads to his own greener pasture, Dad could drop you off in Mugabe Land or somewhere.

All: Great! As the NFL hates Christians, so you hate free, armed, attractive young women. Got it. I note that, the First Amendment being a relic of the 18th Century, you have absolutely no right to express your opinions like this. Kindly cease and desist. Furthermore: Go to Hell!

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I find this normal and more than a little alluring. Watch out, Dana Loesch! Twitter.

If this “highly respected web log” hadn’t blown the budget on cigars and hydrazine, then I would heartily offer these young ladies employment here. As is, I offer them the most sincere respect for being who they are. I accept them. If you can’t, if you can’t abide beautiful women, American, Christian, and free, then you are worse than a bigot. Literally worse than Hitler. Knock it off.